Sunlight Moonlight
by clever.tricks
Summary: Gary visits Raoul in the desert.


_Author's Note: Written for Goldenlake SMACKDOWN, 2011. This fic was originally inspired by the Indigo Girls' song Get Out the Map, but the apple fell pretty far from the tree as I got further into writing it. _

Raoul hadn't yet adjusted to the desert sun. Where in the north, the sun was softened and absorbed by the excessiveness of what grew and lived by it, here there was little living to suck up the light and heat, and it reflected off the vast sand into his eyes. Raoul had been subject to blindness, watery eyes and mistaken sight since had ventured into the desert past Persepolis, his vision was so overwhelmed by the profusion of light. He thus believed, when there appeared a figure in the distance, that he saw an illusion. It wasn't until the Sandrunners remarked upon it, and they rode out to meet or attack it, that it was established to be a real person approaching on horseback. As Raoul rode out with the others to investigate, he could hardly be convinced that what he thought he saw could be right. He _thought_he saw Gary riding towards them, but even as he persuaded the Sandrunners not to shoot, he couldn't quite believe it. He shaded his eyes with his hand and saw Gary's sunburnt, happy face. He too seemed dazzled – though whether that was the sun or the result of finally having converged with Raoul after weeks of searching, is difficult to know. It wasn't until they embraced that each could be assured of their mutual reality.

There were so many introductions, welcomes and thank-yous to be made, it wasn't until long after dark that they had the chance to speak alone. They walked out over the dunes, footsteps sinking into the sand, which gave way under them. The moon was out, now. Like the sun, it was intensified in the desert, its light reflected around them, but its illumination was soft, and they appeared subtle in each others' eyes. The moon had none of the sun's harsh clarity; its caress was tender. The temperature had dropped, and the two men huddled in their burnooses. Gary observed, "You'd hardly believe this is the same place at night. It feels so different."

Fed up after a day of polite conversation, Raoul ignored this and asked his question directly, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you."

"Why come all this way?"

"I, well, I missed you. I wanted to see you, all right?"

"How did you find me?"

"It wasn't easy. Are you mad I came?"

Raoul thought about this. No, he decided, he wasn't mad, though he had intended to be. He sighed. "I came here to get some separation from court things, but having yo here feels better than I thought it would."

"I'm a 'court thing'?" Gary was surprised and hurt, and he stared at the moon, rather than looking at Raoul.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. No, you're not a court thing at all. But I needed to get out of there, and get some perspective. You've always been suited to palace life; I'm not. But I _am_glad you came. I thought you were a mirage when I first saw you." Gary said nothing and continued to stare at the sky, tracing star patterns with his eyes. "Gary? I'm sorry. Please say something."

Gary swallowed. "It's just, I really missed you." He turned to stumble across the sand, but Raoul grabbed his wrist.

"Don't go that way, you'll get lost."

Gary glanced around the surrounding desert. It seemed to go on forever, stretching into the sky, and he couldn't understand how something so vast could feel so suffocating.

"Are you all right? You're breathing kind of hard. Maybe we should go back - "

His wrist prickling, Gary looked back at Raoul, who brushed Gary's chestnut hair out of the way to peer into his eyes. "What's wrong? I'm sorry about what I said…" The hands Raoul had around Gary's wrist and in his hair slackened as Gary kissed him. The approach had been slow, Gary's eyes finally and steadily locked with Raoul's. Raoul had plenty of time to retreat, but he found himself standing still, waiting for the connection, unable to quite believe it was coming. Like the desert did, their kisses seemed to reflect the sky above. Fragile and hazy in the moonlight; tremulous and exploratory. They grew feverish as the unbearable sun rose above them.


End file.
